how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.