The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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