I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize