I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
