i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
