I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
