she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
