Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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