I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
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