Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
She even gives head with a lisp.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
