I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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