I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
