Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
