Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize