he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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