what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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