it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
no. you can't hotbox the world.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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