i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
