I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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