I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
this beer tastes like vomit already
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
she smelled like a LAN party
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
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