Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize