I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
