Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize