The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
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