i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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