idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
