I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
