we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
