omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
