whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
