hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
