Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
