Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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