Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
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