And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
