i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
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