I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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