I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
