She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?