its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Your dad touched me again.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
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