If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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