how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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