I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
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I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
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