Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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