you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
