Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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