I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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