i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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