Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
