yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
