ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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