everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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